Practical Appreciative Inquiry based strategies to effectively resolve grief and resentment.
What Readers Say
This book is a gold mine of practical methods to make things better.
Ed Leidel, Episcopal Bishop and Congregational Coach serving North America.
Rob Voyle has produced the most comprehensive manual for dealing with the consequences of serious negative life events.
Andy Austin, author, The Rainbow machine: Tales from a Neurolinguist's Journal.
This book is filled with things you can actually do to heal from grief and resentment. Whether you use this book on your own, as a member of a group, or to help others, you will find here a resource rich with hands-on and effective strategies for healing. Jim Finley, author, Merton's Palace of Nowhere.
The Rev. Dr. Rob Voyle is a leader in the development and use of appreciative inquiry in church and coaching settings.
Rob's Approach to Retreats
- Helpful: Retreats must provide practical, sustainable solutions for today's challenges.
- Humorous: Creativity and humor go together as people enjoy new insights.
- Healing: We create opportunities for people to experience transformational insights that lead to new ways of living, working, and being in the world.
>> See more on Rob's
Helpful, Humorous, Healing
approach to training.
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Restoring Hope Retreat: Resolving Grief and Resentment
Restoring Hope Retreat: Resolving Grief and Resentment
This retreat is based on the processes outlined in Rob Voyle's book Restoring Hope
Are you suffering from:
- An inability to free yourself from resentment?
- Being overwhelmed by grief?
- Trapped in shame and self-criticism?
- Distressful memories?
If you want to be free of such suffering then you need to learn the Art of Resolving Trauma, Grief, and Resentment
Resolving Trauma, Grief, and Resentment is
Not About Learning to Forget
Forgetting bad things is a real problem,
because then we will have to repeat them
to remember that they are painful.
When we resolve grief we don't want to forget our loved one. We want people to remember their loved ones with love and gratitude rather than not-forget them by being miserable.
We cannot change one iota of our past.
We can only change how we remember our past.
The Art of "Resolving"
Time doesn't heal anything it is what we do during the time that will result in healing or ongoing misery.
Take a moment and think of two distressing things from your past where:
- One still evokes distressing feelings.
- The other, while distressing at the time, is no longer distressing.
We would say the second memory or experience is "resolved". Often this resolution occurs at an unconscious level without our conscious awareness of having done anything. However we can discover what you did to solve the distress of that memory and then use the same strategy to "re-solve" the distressing memory.
We Need to Learn How to Remember and
Not Continually Relive
The damaging emotions associated to memories we have
of bad things that have occurred in our lives.
Listen to Dr. Voyle teach on Resolving Painful Memories
Restoring Hope: Retreat Format
This retreat is provided in one-day and weekend formats.
Retreat content is flexible to meet the needs of participants.
- Creating Basic Resources:
An awareness of Eternal Loving Kindness
The Golden Thread of Life.
- Resolving Resentment:
Discovering the dynamics of your resentment
Learning the dynamics and art of sustainable forgiveness
- Resolving Grief:
Discovering the mechanism of grief
Learning the art of resolving grief and living in hope
In addition to the One-Day processes the longer retreat includes:
- The Three faces of compassion: tenderness, fierceness and resentment.
- Understanding the nature of distressing memories and how to resolve them.
- Dealing with "difficult people" without resorting to resentment.
- Resolving shame and self-criticism.
No Continuing Education Credit
This program is deliberately designed as a personal retreat in contrast to most of our training programs which provide professional continuing education for clergy coaches and therapists. Because it is a personal healing retreat, no continuing education credit is provided.
For Restoring Hope continuing education programs for coaches, clergy, and therapists please see: Restoring Hope Training.
The retreat will typically be conducted in a retreat setting with:
- Didactic presentations describing the dynamics of resolving trauma, grief, and resentment
- Experiential exercises to personally implement healing strategies
- Time for personal reflection and synthesis
Day-long programs are typically at a sponsoring church or organization. No additional accommodation is provided.
Multi-day retreats are typically held at retreat centers and overnight accommodation is provided as well as meals between sessions. Commuter options are also typically available.
Because the locations differ accommodation costs will be specified of the specific retreat registration form.
Rob Voyle is an ordained Episcopal priest, psychologist, and coach. He is the Director of the Clergy Leadership Institute and author of numerous practical resources for applying the Appreciative Way to a variety of church and coaching situations.
Registration for a Retreat
No Restoring Hope Retreats Are Currently Scheduled.
Email Rob Voyle if you would like to host a retreat for your constituents.
For a full listing of training programs please see: Training Schedule